“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 NIV.
I want to share some thought with you concerning marriage and what it means to be a husband and a wife. I can say that I have been married to my lovely wife for over twenty years and I can also say that not all of those years were perfect. We didn’t come to Christ in our relationship until the latter part of our twenty years. I am speaking from experience, from observation, and from conversations and comments made by other married men and women.
What does it mean to be “married”? Why do we get married? How are we to treat each other in marriage? What should we expect in marriage? Are there certain rules we should follow? Who is the boss and what does that mean? There are many other questions we could ask about marriage. All these questions have been debated no doubt and the answers may seem straight forward to many. What does God say about marriage?
Let me start by stating the obvious or at least it should be known by any man or woman on earth and it is that God created marriage. Let that soak in for a minute and ponder what that really means to you and your marriage or future marriage. This is a union, a new creation, that God blesses one man and one woman to be joined together “…and they become one flesh”. The first thought is that becoming one flesh is sexual in nature and that is certainly true, but it is deeper than that. I want to point to what Jesus said about marriage. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” Mark 10:7-9. Here Jesus was speaking after some Pharisees came and tested him with questions about divorce and that Moses permitted it. Jesus replied “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law.” This was not God’s law but one written by Moses.
I want to focus in on what God means by two becoming one. Jesus clearly states that the two, man and woman, become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one. Our bodies are one unit with a head and four limbs. We are born with everything intact and whole. You cannot disconnect parts of your body and expect things to work as they should and you certainly couldn’t do that with your inner parts. If you remove certain inner parts you will die instantly. You are one whole body with all the working parts needed to complete your bodily function. Jesus said that in marriage your whole body and your partner’s whole body become one body. Your two bodies mix together so to speak such that you cannot distinguish your former single parts from your now married parts. This mix is a new creation united by God so that two become one in every sense of the word. Then Jesus caps this off with “…let man not separate”; this includes the husband or the man of the marriage. Just as I could not personally open my chest and remove my heart and still live so to you cannot cut your wife or husband apart from the one new creation that they became and be the same after.
Let me say that besides a physical oneness a husband and wife share they also are one in every part of their lives. How about money? So many times I have heard a married man say, “I pay the mortgage out of my account, my wife is supposed to pay our electric bill from her account… etc..etc…etc.” What is this I hear? He pays this and she pays that; his money and her money, his account and her account. I believe I hear a separation in this marriage. I have heard these kinds of comments so many times and I still don’t believe that married one’s actually live this way. Do you realize that your shortfalls as a single unmarried person become part of the shortfalls of your spouse once you are married? With God’s Grace your new marriage, or new creation, will overcome each of your “single” short falls you once had before marriage. A married couple who prays together in Christ also battle together in life and all this worlds evil arrows aimed right at you.
What are the vows that a man and woman say at their wedding? In sickness and health, for rich or poor, in good times and bad times…you will still stay together. These words or words like them, the vows, are created by man to reflect the law that God handed down to us regarding our new creation in marriage. You vow to stay together come hell or high water or fill in what you can imagine that would be good things or bad in body or in life.
The devil will shoot flaming arrows at you and your spouse as he wants to separate you and destroy you. “In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.” Ephesians 6:16 NIV. This is a part of the armor of God that you can put on to battle the devil who wants to separate and kill. The scripture says this in Ephesians 6: 10-15; “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of the evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to sand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.”
I understand and know full well that the power of the devil and his works are always trying to work into your life, your spouse’s life, your kids’ lives, or anyone you hold dear. The tools he will use are much of the time used through other people, even people we love and trust can be used if we do not all cloth ourselves in the armor of God and stand firm. This may not be easy and for sure there will be sad times, hard times, tearing times, and up and down in marriage and therefor in life.
Here is the good news. Even if you are battling in a broken marriage or even divorced, God still loves you and therefore you can start new….Just as simple as waking up one morning and thinking “I want a new life, a new me, and I don’t want to live like this anymore..” Did you know that if you make this decision about yourself and that if you realize that God is the answer to all your questions, all your hope, all your problems, all your stuff you seem to be stuck in and just have faith that God can help you make this change in your life, God will take whatever you have right now and if you give it to Him—he will begin His work in you like nothing you have ever experienced before. If you think you need one mile and think that you only have it in you to give one inch-give it to God. God will work in you and before you know it, you will have gone two miles with His strength just by your faith and belief. Just believe that Jesus, the only Son of God came down from Heaven and suffered the sins of the world, died on the cross, and by Gods own power Jesus was raised from the dead and is now sitting on His thrown in Heaven at Gods right hand. God loves us so much that He decided to step out of that perfect place into our sinful mess on earth to pay the only price that could take away our sins forever.
All you need to do is believe in Jesus Christ that He took your sins away and only through Him you can be born again…a new life… and that spark of faith you can have will change your world and the way you see the world forever. Yes we have a temporary home on earth and because of sin we have a human condition that we cannot solve ourselves. We were made to be with God and so we will never feel right about ourselves until we are reunited with God. You can do that right now by asking Jesus into your life…it is just that simple.
Let me end with this. Look up 2 Peter 1:5-11 in a Bible, you can find it online from a trusted source. There are qualities that God says will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. Read this passage, but here are the qualities. First start with Faith in Jesus Christ, add goodness in your life, and knowledge of God’s word (start reading the bible), add self-control perseverance, to that add godliness, then add brotherly kindness, and finally followed by love. If you add these qualities, and increase in them, you will be a productive person in the life of Jesus Christ.
God Bless,
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